December 27, 2010 a much more enjoyable day with Martha

I awakened this morning with a bit of fear that today would mirror yesterday.  Well, to start, the water had frozen but thanks to Cousin Kip the heat tape was plugged in and water was freely running.  Mom was very quiet in her room for a long time (thanks to the baby monitor I knew this). So after a bit of time I opened the door and Mom was lying in bed talking to the unseen and moving her hands about. All morning I had been thinking of the right approach to use in dealing with Mom.  I went in and she looked right through me.  So, I sat on the bed for a few minutes and just talked to her.  Then I asked her if I could help her get out of bed.  She mumbled something so I took it as a yes.  After some wincing (Mom that is not me), she sat up.  We took our time getting to the potty.  I think this may be the way to deal with her.  Aunt Lorraine had said she wonders if somewhere in her mind she knows she has lost some of her dignity.  I decided to give her some more choices and take as much time as it takes to finish a task.  This is hard for me because I like to finish things as quickly as possible so I can move on to the next and accomplish as much in one day as possible (oh yeah Martha, thanks for passing that on to me!!!).  Needless to say, the day went quite well.  After washing up she stayed in her P.J.'s all day and seemed happy. I moved the rocker closer to the table so she could see her "children" as she had her meals.  By the way, she ate quite well today.  She and I laughed and she told me some whopper stories.  We even did the potty thing a few times and had no incidences at all.  After dinner she seemed to wind down and I thought she was ready for bed when she got her second wind.  We had the Dukes of Hazzard on (I really am not pleased with Dish Network but oh well.....) and the Duke boys were crawling into the General Lee when Mom went right up to the TV and said "You'd better do what he says or you'll be dead, DED, dead": I thought I would crack a rib laughing at that one.  I love my sweet little innocent Mom.  The Hospice nurse and I decided today that Mom can't take much stimulation and that is when quite often she acts out.  Like Mother like Daughter!!  She does love my dog Nova but keeps her in line especially when she chases the cat.  But, oh she hates it when I send Nova to her cage.  She'll say, "aw the poor little thing she's crying".  Kind of the way she protected her granddaughters from the mean parents. Tonight out of the blue Mom asked me if she was nice to me.  I told her most of the time she was but, last night she was mean and hit me.  She responded by telling me she shouldn't do that, to which I responded that we love each other and we'll just be nicer to each other then she was off on one of her long stories about something.  Each day I learn a new way of doing something and am so thankful that God is with me through all of this.  Many a time in the day I cry out to Him for His help and guidance.  He has not failed me.  I am so thankful for my family, too.  My girls have been a rock to me, so faithful and thoughtful.  Thanks girls I am so proud of you.  Dolly calls almost everyday to check on me and give a little pep talk.  Patty and I converse often and even though she is so far away she still does what she can.  She supports my choices.  I am truly blessed with such a faithful family of strong women!!  That's about all I can think of to say.  The saga of Martha will continue tomorrow.  Goodnight.