January 1, 2011 New Year's Day with Martha

I am sitting at the kitchen table with Mom and Shannon and Mom is entertaining us with her cute self.  We just had dinner and she ate well.  Tonight she had to be fed but tried to feed herself her ice cream.  Last night she said to me, "Let's have some ice cream" so tonight we had her ice cream.  She always did like her ice cream!  Shannon and I were at the table and Mom sat here quiet for awhile when out of the blue she said, "Tomorrow I will die, surely", then she touched her shoulder.  Later she turned to Shannon and asked her if she wanted another cigarette?  Go figure, what was that all about.  Today turned out to be a P.J. day.  I figured since she refused to get out of bed until about 2 pm and she already had her p.j. bottoms off that it surely had to be a sign.  I did get a good punch in the arm (with a fist no less) when I tried the feminine hygiene thing.  But don't worry the mission was successful!!  Mom did alot of talking to the walls and corners today.  I truly, truly believe that she has small angels that she sees and talks with all day.  Given the knowledge that Martha always loved children, it makes total sense to me.  We kept the monitor on for most of the day so we could hear what she was up to in her room and we'd hear her talking and laughing.  Angels, I tell you.  Shannon was in the hallway with her and she asked me if the name Judy had any significance to me.  Well you see, we had a sister Judy, Mom's second child that died 12 hours after birth from Spina Bifida.  She mentioned her quite a few times.  Neat thought that Mom could be able to be playing with her daughter that she never got to play with before.  Now, you know what I said about the small angels.  Maybe God has an angel playing with Mom that looks like my sister Judy.  You know, I think when I get to heaven I'm gonna check out my theory with God.  Mom spent alot of time in the hallway outside my craft room door.  As she was sitting there she asked, "Would you like another piece of colored paper?"  It is very rare that Mom puts a whole sentence together that makes any sense, at least to us.  Once again, perhaps my theory is correct? Mom still has alot of strength but, I can see her declining.  She walks a little slower, and is a little more wobbly, and sleeps alot more.  These are things that almost all aging people experience, but with Mom's added diagnosis I guess I seem to be more aware of them.  I think she really enjoyed having Shannon here - I imagine she gets tired of me telling her what to do and making her do things she'd rather not do.  She called me Mom today.  Maybe she is seeing me as Grandma Harvey-oh my gosh what have I turned into?!!  I got the nicest phone call today from Terry Harvey, my cousin.  She wanted to say it to mouth to ear about how she and her girls and Tom feel about Mom and the positive effect she has had on their lives. You know, I know Mom has touched an awful lot of lives and I say I don't think I have ever heard of a person who didn't like her but, it makes me so proud that she is, my Mom. Terry thank you for the loving heartfelt words to me about Mom.  My sisters and I really appreciate those kind of words.  Words and thoughts like that make what is happening to our Mom a little bit easier to bear.  My only wish is that I could be half the woman my Mom was and is.  Thank you Lord you have given me more time on this earth so I can still keep trying.  So goes another day in our journey with little Martha Marie (Harvey) Ormsbee, let's see what new things tomorrow brings.  Good night and Happy New Year to all.  Tom I look forward to seeing all of you guys.