"It's Almost Impossible to Put Into Words"

Today's post in our "Honoring Martha" series comes from Heather Harvey Fico. To see the full details of this series, click here. It may not have been easy, but Heather has very lovingly and articulately put her feelings about my amazing Grandma into words. Grab a tissue (or a whole box) and read on.

How can I put into words how I feel about Aunt Martha?  I just don't think it's possible.  She's the only person I know who can evoke such a warm feeling.  She would surround you with her love and spirit and you FELT it.  When she spoke, when she smiled, in her little chuckle and especially when she hugged you.  She could make you feel so incredibly loved.  It's a feeling I hold on to tightly.

I used to love to go to "New York State" to visit.  That is always what we called it.  We would pack up the car and leave incredibly early.  You always had to make sure you went to the bathroom first because my dad was notorious for not stopping.  There was only one stop, Yetter's Diner.  Remember Mom?  April?  But we didn't really mind because it brought us to Grandma's house that much faster and that meant seeing our family that much sooner.

I have very simple memories of Aunt Martha, but sometimes simple memories are the best.  I remember how she would treat us like we could do anything.  Wash dishes, make pancakes, anything.  We were allowed to do those things that made us feel special and useful and just a little grown-up.  I remember long walks down her road with her at night and you could see the stars so brightly.  One night we had two cars pass us and she remarked, "Boy it's busy tonight!"  I remember being gathered around her table and how neat and comfortable her house always was.  I remember her deep love for Uncle Bucky and her family. 

She would always go outside with me, where she would always proceed to pick the sticks up out of her yard.  Even that was kept neat and tidy.  I remember helping her pick beetles off the plants in her garden and she told me what each one was and how to take care of them.  She always listened to what I had to say and would always pause for a "picture" that I snapped with the antique camera she would let us play with.  Do you remember that band-aid game we used to play there April and Megan? 

Every year we would faithfully visit the graves with her, Aunt Lorraine, Aunt Bev and Grandma Harvey on Memorial Day.  My husband, my daughters and my parents would all drive up together.  Aunt Martha and Aunt Lorraine would always let my girls, Bella and Madi, help plant the flowers.  Always guiding their hands with such love, gentleness and encouragement.  Like I said, such simple memories, but they mean so much.  We would then head to each cemetery, planting our flowers on our family graves and she would talk and tell us family stories.  Afterward, we would head to our family picnic prepared by Aunt Margie and spend time talking and laughing.  I remember the time we went for one of our walks, I was pregnant with Madi and as Bella ran ahead on the path, she's asked how I was feeling.  I told her I was a little tired, but good.  She turned to me and smiled that smile of hers, and said, "I remember when my girls were young, I was so busy and I just wished I had 5 minutes to sit down.  And now all I do is sit.  It goes so fast, enjoy them."  So much wisdom in those simple words and I think of them often when I feel overwhelmed or tired.

A few years ago, when Aunt Martha was just starting to become "forgetful", I had the intelligence to tell her how much I loved and appreciated her.  She just smiled and chuckled, said "awww' and gave me one of her famous hugs.  I'm not usually one to express my feeling in words, but I am so glad I stepped up that time and just said it.

The last time I saw her, we were at Aunt Lorraine's birthday party.  She was having a good day and seemed to remember me and my girls.  As the day progressed it didn't take long for her to forget, but I was so glad she remembered us.  At least I like to think she did.

How do you sum up the impact one woman can make on your life?  It's almost impossible to put into words, but I think of her often and what better way to honor someone than to remember them and share their stories with others.  She is goodness personified.

Thank you so much Stacie for thinking of this and organizing it.  I really look forward to reading everyone's post.

And thank you so much for taking the time to write this, Heather. It was so beautiful and full of love!  Love, ~Stacie